Naughty Strategies for a Bad Boss

Bad bosses are quite common in work places, or maybe they are not so common as we think, but are common enough in our perception of bosses and workplaces. Ultimately experiencing life comes down to your personal observation and experiences of any given set of circumstances. So, if you feel you have a bad boss, for you that boss is bad regardless of him/her being the best and kindest person in the world for others. So, here are some strategies to try out and handle a boss you perceive as bad. We do not suggest that you try them out without the application of your own mind, and claim not to be held liable for any ill consequences of the use of such strategies. We do not advise you use them, but do vouch that some have reported of having used the same or similar strategies and having good results.

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• A genuinely bad boss is usually a egomaniac, so the first strategy is to soothe that ego, and convince him/her that he/she is ‘in control’ followed by continual reassurances

• Reports: people who do not understand reports want them continuously and it is a common trait shared by bad bosses that they fly off their handles over reports. The only answer is to prepare reports assiduously and keep sending as many reports as possible and also include the time spent on preparing reports. Don’t procrastinate on sending reports even if you procrastinate on doing the actual work. A friend of mine (confirmed procrastinator) never got caught because she keeps sending assiduous and regular reports including the fact that work was incomplete, pending, or under process. At the same time better workers get rebuked because their reports had not reached the boss’s mailbox. Bad bosses keep insisting on reports but rarely take the time to open and view what an employee has sent in as a daily report.




• Bad boss likes a slave: On many instances there are bad bosses who crave attention on a 24X7 basis. They never get it from anyone ultimately, but those who manage to pull off the ruse of providing 24X7 attentions become the darling of the bad boss, and soon find their actions being defended by the boss rather than being criticized. A favorite strategy of some of my friends is to submit only part of the work during office hours and carry back most documentation done during office hours to home. Then they set up mails with randomly scheduled timings so that the work is submitted by the mailing software in separately timed randomly scheduled mails up to a given point of time at night. Documentary evidence excludes oral evidence, and the boss is convinced of the concerned employee staying up through nights doing office work. It makes the boss happy. And you can do it while you sleep.

• Setup and insist on weekly meetings so that the boss can rewind on you at least once a week inside his/her cabin rather than creating scenes in public

• Follow the time-tested policy of ‘yes boss’: Never contradict or try to prove your intelligence. Bad bosses are convinced that they are the most intelligent being around, and even if company rules might compel them to ask for suggestions, someone making a really intelligent suggestion or ‘out of the box’ suggestion would be quickly put down and derided – don’t get into the line of fire

• If the boss is a woman, keep low profiles during lunar cycles when she is apt to be extra-bitchy; if the boss is a man, remember testosterone levels are the highest in the morning and use that to your advantage

In the end, to handle a bad boss, always use your own intuition and common sense. Though all bad bosses share common traits of micromanagement and counterproductive attitudes, symptoms manifest themselves according to sets of circumstances. There is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ strategy for handling bad bosses and do a thorough SWAT analysis of the character before trying tacit management of the bully.



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